When a Dream Becomes a Burden
It was 1985, I had just finished basic training at Fort Dix in New Jersey. I was on my way to San Francisco, CA, to the Defensive Language Institute to learn German before starting my new job in the US Army. I had joined the Army because I didn’t know what else to do. I thought it would give me interesting things to do and see.
I had spent my life wanting to go to Nashville and sing my original songs, play guitar and be a country music star. I had a notebook full of lyrics I had written. When I was 12, I sang in Nashville at the Gospel Music Convention with my siblings as the McCarley Trio. It was an overwhelming feeling of joy. We traveled and sang with so many wonderful groups, it was what I was born to do (or so I thought).
I was 18 years old. It was my first time away from home, and this little soldier was headed to CALIFORNIA! As I flipped through the back of a magazine, I saw an ad.
“Recording Studio-K-ARK Studios in Nashville, TN looking for talented Singer/Songwriters Call- Ron Grady at xxx-xxx-xxxx”
I quickly ripped it from the magazine and starred at it holding my breath. That tiny two inch square of paper! Why couldn’t I have found this BEFORE I joined the Army for four years. Suddenly this tiny square of paper was more than an ad, it was my life. I would spend years pulling it out and looking at it. I prayed over it. I claimed it. It was MY dream, it was MY treasure and it would by waiting for me one day.
The sad part about it was that because I was focused on what SHOULD be happening in my mind, I missed what was ACTUALLY NEEDING to happen. The Army became a prison, activities were fillers, things were holding me back. I couldn’t embrace now because I was lost in later.
How many times in life do we get stuck thinking something is best for us, when it isn’t. Then, we lose sight of chances happening all around us because we are stuck on what we think we know.
Fast forward to 1992. A small group of friends took me to the bus stop in Montgomery, AL. I didn’t own a car. I had my suitcases and my guitar on my back. (Truly a country music song in the making.) I was moving to Memphis to be with my mom. It was the closest to Nashville I could get, but it was a SIGN! I was getting closer.
As we waited for hours on the bus, we realized…it wasn’t coming, so the next day, a few friends drove me to Memphis.
I pulled the little piece of paper from my wallet and dialed the number believing that after six years the studio was still ready for me!! They were!!
“Mr. Grady will see you on Thursday at 10:00 am”. I was beaming.
I walked in Thursday morning and saw this man behind his desk. He had his shirt unbutton three buttons with several gold chains and a hairy chest. His hair was dyed unnaturally brown. I told him my story. He wasn’t moved.
So many times we have a dream or goal, and others aren’t impressed or interested…and thats ok. Its your vision, not theirs.
His voice was cartoonish as he looked me over “whatcha got toots?” I don’t remember everything he said, just that it’s a “hard road sweety, but it can pay off if you can stick it out. You gotta have thick skin do you have thick skin hon? We need to see a little of whacha got.”… Suddenly it was as if the curtain had been pulled back from OZ, and there was no Wizard! I wasn’t sad. I was relieved.
He told me all the steps to take and scheduled another appointment, but I knew I wouldn’t be back. As I drove back to Memphis, I cried. I cried because I fixated myself on something that truly didn’t line up with my HEART. I wanted to minister with my lyrics and had thought that was my only path.
At that moment I set a goal. This year I will minister with my songs to 10,000 people. I didn’t know how. But I started downtown Memphis with a homeless man. I came home and wrote Mr. Such and Such. He was 1. Then I counted two. I went to nursing homes and counted 30 here and there. Opportunities began to arise left and right. As the year ended, I looked at my journal, and I was nearly 1000 short of my goal.
The next week I was invited to sing for 15 min every hour at a civic center in Memphis feeding 1000 people for Thanksgiving Dinner. That was 1993. God did it, but I had to make the effort.
